Ask Mollie: Does It Get Easier?

Dear Mollie,

My husband is in the army. We are going to be moving to Ft. Riley KS soon. I’m kind of scared. I don’t know the first thing about being a Army wife. He is also going to be going over seas shortly after arriving, he didn’t give me really any details but from what it sounds like it’s going to be soon. He has been gone for 7 months, at training. I was wondering if it ever gets any easier.  I’m 22 years old and we have 2 kids together, a 13 month old and 4 month old. I also have a 6 year old but her dad wont let her leave the state so she is staying with my parents. I have worries about him leaving. And about (what you said) ‘hitting rock bottom.

— Stephanie

Dear Stephanie,

First off you have a lot on your plate at a very young age. I think the first thing you need to do is read a couple military wife books. I suggest, “Duty Calls”. You can get it on Amazon. This book really helped me. If you just google “Military Wife “ on Amazon a ton of books pop up. Mine will be out later, I hope you read that too. Also, you need to find out from your husband when he is deploying. If he is going to deploy soon after getting to his duty station, I think you need to actually move in with your mom and dad till he gets back from deployment. I am concerned about your six-year-old not seeing you. I never encourage families to move in with mom and dad, but with your six-year-old separated from you, and your husband gone, mom and dad maybe that secure home you need.

All military bases have a support network. You can find them by searching the base paper, or a base’s MWR or MCCS website. Get involved with a mommy and me club or play group. Being a military wife is extremely hard. You must have a support network of other military moms or wives around you in order to make it through. Please have a candid and honest talk with your hubby and do what is best for you and all your children



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